So I noticed...

So, I noticed how my blog page views have gone up since my last post. Isn't it amazing how people are so drawn into drama? So, yeah, I had a Psychotic Break. Big deal. I mean, you all know how I am anyway? I'm allowed to get frustrated. And, I'm allowed to feel like giving up. And I'm allowed to write those feelings down because that is what helps me deal with those feelings and that is actually what helps me overall...writing. And to those who sent the nasty, rude e-mails...all I have to say is don't say a word about someone else's life until you've walked a mile in their shoes. Yes, I realize that my life is pretty good and there are people who are suffering and who are much worse off than me, but until you know exactly what I'm experiencing and going through, keep the nasty comments to yourself. Each and every one of you has been blocked from e-mailing me. I'm trying to make a better life for myself and my children and I'm doing the best I can. I just lost my dear Grandmother on my birthday. Yes, it was 5 months ago and I should feel better by now, but I don't I feel worse. Some of you say to get over it because she was ONLY my grandmother. Some of you don't realize that NO, she wasn't ONLY my grandmother. She was like a mother to me growing up and kept me safe when I was a child. I don't have many memories of my childhood, but the years I spent camping with my grandparents...those memories are still VERY vivid to this day. I remember them very clearly. So, before you go and say, "Well, so and so has it worse because they lost their mother, father, husband, wife, child, etc..." think about it. When my son died, all I kept hearing was, "well, at least you didn't get to know him. It would have been so much harder if you had the opportunity to know him." Unless you've lost a pregnancy, don't say a fucking word about how someone should feel about losing their unborn child. And yes, I DID get to know him. I felt him kick and move around and hiccup for 8 months. Either way, I buried my CHILD. It's supposed to be the other way around. Parents aren't supposed to bury their children...so, if it is your opinion that I should "be lucky" that he died before he was born, you can go to hell. Thanks.