Depression

I had such a good day in treatment today. I've been having better days as each day goes by. In one of our last groups today, in which I was paying attention but not paying attention...usually I pay attention fiercely, but I just don't like this Counselor because she sugar coats everything and baby's everyone instead of doing her job and she has this annoying "raspy" type voice...she only works on Wednesdays and had the nerve to say in group today that when people come into treatment verses when they are discharged they are like night and day...so, yesterday my therapist says that you aren't 100% when you leave, they are just confident that you have the proper skills and that you don't necessarily need that high level of care anymore. Which makes perfect sense. If we waited until every client was 100%, no one would ever get discharged!!!! Anyway, she was asking if anyone struggled with having a hard time accepting that they needed to be in treatment and I just nodded my head yes, didn't raise my hand or speak. Lucky me, she saw me nod my head and asked if I would share. So, I took a noticeably deep breath and a second to gather my thoughts so I could say what I wanted to say in a way that didn't sound so...authoritative. So, I share that the most difficult part for me was that I was a Drug Addiction Counselor and that admitting to having to sit in "the other chair" (as I call it) was something that was very difficult for me to accept. But, I shared that it helped me to learn that there were other therapists there, social workers, teachers, RN's, etc and that addiction wasn't prejudice...it can get anyone and that even though my addiction was a food addiction, it was still an addiction and still a struggle to me. Not sure what I said exactly, but there was a gentleman there who had only been there for a day or two and as we walked out he put his hand on my arm and said, "thank you." (I was the last one to speak before the group ended.) I'm not sure how I helped him or what I did for him, but just knowing that I helped someone for one day made me feel so incredible. I've been out of work now for about a month and it's been killing me. Of course, it's gotten easier, but just to know that I've helped someone...well, it kind of made my day...until the snow, walk, car lock incident. But, now that I'm thinking of it again, I feel better :-)